Rewriting the Aging Narrative

Transforming Your Perspective on Growing Older

Author

Cara Gray
February 05, 2025

Dear Friends,

Last week, I stood before the mirror, new reading glasses perched on my nose. The reflection stared back, a mix of disbelief and amusement in my eyes. 54. How did this happen?

Hours earlier, I’d blown out birthday candles, celebration mingling with surrealism. Wasn’t it yesterday I was navigating my 30s, fretting over every line?

Yet here’s the twist: I feel alive.

There’s a confidence humming through me that my younger self could only dream of. The chatter of others’ opinions has faded to a murmur, easily dismissed. I’ve traded people-pleasing for soul-nourishing, and let me tell you – it’s liberating.

I’m not above a little age-defying help. My bathroom counter hosts lotions and potions. I’ve got my morning green smoothie, collagen, select pharmaceuticals. The red light mask appears regularly, and you’ll catch me mid-eye patch often.

But these aren’t desperate attempts to cling to youth. They’re investments in vitality. I’m embracing every line while meeting each year with energy.

The real magic is in the mindset. I’m not just accepting this chapter – I’m claiming it. These years ahead? They’re brimming with potential. They might be my best yet.

So, reader, I’m curious: Are you nodding along, feeling that spark for what’s ahead? Or does embracing your age make you want to hide?

If it’s the latter, know this: You’re not alone. The journey to loving our evolving selves isn’t straight. But it’s worth taking. And it’s one of the things I help my clients navigate.

Shall we dive in? Let’s explore how to make these coming years spectacular.

Embracing the Third Act: Cultivating a Positive Attitude Toward Aging

The journey through life’s later chapters can be one of profound growth, freedom, and fulfillment—if we approach it with intention. Research reveals that those who view aging through a positive lens live longer, healthier lives, with a 43% lower mortality risk over four years compared to peers with negative perceptions. Let’s explore how to reframe aging and unlock its hidden opportunities.

Why Mindset Matters

A positive attitude toward aging isn’t just “feel-good” advice—it’s science-backed:

• Physical benefits: Lower risks of diabetes, heart disease, and stroke, plus better sleep and mobility.
• Mental resilience: Reduced depression, enhanced cognitive function, and stronger social connections.
• Longevity boost: Optimists live 11–15% longer on average. Negative stereotypes about decline become self-fulfilling prophecies. By contrast, embracing aging as a phase of wisdom and exploration rewires both mindset and biology.

❝

I’ve always believed that the key to staying young is to keep challenging yourself, to keep pushing boundaries, and to never stop learning. Age is just a number; it’s your mindset that defines your potential.

-Richard Branson (Founder of Virgin Group)

Improve Your Attitude About Aging

I am starting to give in-person workshops where I take the attendees through a benchmarking exercise of the 12 key areas of a successful third act transition - Attitude About Aging being one of the areas. The workshop also includes a workbook to help the attendees move forward with the gaps they have identified. Here some journaling prompts and exercises I include to help improve your attitude about aging:

  1. Self-Perception: Write down 3 words that come to mind when you think of yourself “aging.” Are these words helpful or hurtful?

  2. Role of Society: How have societal or cultural messages shaped your views on getting older?

  3. Reframing Aging: What aspects of aging do you appreciate (e.g., wisdom, freedom, time for interests)?

  4. Positive Affirmations: Create an affirmation (e.g., “I am growing wiser and bolder with each year”) and repeat it daily.

  5. Challenge Ageist Beliefs: Notice when you use age as an excuse. Replace “I’m too old for that” with “I’m curious to try.”

  6. Lifetime Learning: Sign up for a class or course in something completely new—prove to yourself that it’s never too late to learn.

The Freedom of “What’s Next?”

Aging isn’t about loss—it’s about editing life to focus on what truly matters. As you shed outdated roles and expectations, you gain space to:

• Reinvent your identity beyond career.
• Deepen relationships without the rush of earlier decades.
• Say “no” to obligations and “yes” to adventures.

💡 This Week’s Challenge

Try one new activity that scares you slightly—a dance class, AI tutorial, or solo dinner. Note how it reshapes your self-perception.

By reframing aging as a privilege rather than a decline, we unlock decades of potential. As psychologist Eric Kim notes, “Mindsets shape behaviors—and behaviors shape health”. Your third act isn’t an epilogue; it’s a bold new volume. How will you write it?

🔥 This week, I recorded a fantastic podcast 🎙️ episode with Alicia Johnson, a mature and plus-size Ford Model (yes, the Naomi, Christy, Brooke agency!), writer, and transformation strategist. I cannot wait for you all to hear it! We very much talked about embracing getting older and Alicia is leading the way in the world of mature beauty and fashion 💄. Stay tuned. I will publish this episode mid-March.

In the meantime, Alicia was recently featured in Forbes. Check it out 👀

ALSO, if you aren’t following my Act Three podcast on Spotify or Apple Podcasts you are missing out! There are currently 29 episodes live and ready for you to binge.

As always I like to give you more content to explore on this subject. Last week, a wealth advisor in my sphere shared this video 📺 with me. There is no better example of embracing aging than Jane Fonda.

A Yale study featured in this CBS News segment reveals that positive beliefs about aging can extend lifespan by 7.5 years on average—outperforming longevity benefits from factors like exercise, low cholesterol, or avoiding smoking. Actress Jane Fonda and anti-ageism advocate Ashton Applewhite highlight how societal stereotypes often equate aging with decline, but shifting this narrative can profoundly impact health outcomes. Have a watch 👀

Stay tuned for weekly content about travel, health, relationships, identity, spirituality, doing good and starting a new venture as it relates to your third act/the next chapter in your life ✨

Please subscribe and forward this newsletter to others who are thinking about planning their third act. Thanks for your support 🙏.

Warm regards,

Cara Gray
Third Act Consultant, CPRC, CEPA™️

P.S. If you want to start planning your third act, set up a time on my calendar for a chat: Schedule a Chat with Cara

P.S.S. If you are curious about my consulting work, there are two options to work with me: deep-dive, transformative 1:1 consulting or a 90-minute intensive, quickstart session. Details about both options can be found here.